i have to tell you something is about falling back into the same old habits. Old habits that made me feel anxious, unwanted, unmotivated, and self-loath. It portrays a quiet environment just like the feeling of dissociation. Each image was taken in a space where I spend most of my time. Making every day feel repetitive but finding some sort of an uneasy comfort. Leaving my environment, the way it is on day-to-day basis. I want my viewer to feel that disconnection I have with others but mainly with myself. The mess in my room shows how I do not have the strength to tidy up. How willingly I am to let the mess accumulate over time. In other words, I have fallen back into my old routine. A routine where each day feels repetitive with nothing new and nothing to look forward too. I am not the same person I once was. The person I was before was happy, outgoing, and motivated to keep moving forward. Soon I realize, it is a signal of the bad habits arising. Because these habits have returned so has the start of isolating and overthinking.
8" x 45" 12" x 45" 13" x 45" 17" x 21" 14" x 45" 17" x 21"
16" x 45"
16" x 45"
16" x 21"
17" x 21"
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"i have to tell you something"i have to tell you something is about falling back into the same old habits. Old habits that made me feel anxious, unwanted, unmotivated, and self-loath. It portrays a quiet environment just like the feeling of dissociation. The images are self-portraits in my own living space. Leaving my environment, the way it is on day-to-day basis. I want my viewer to feel that disconnection I have with others but mainly with myself. The mess in my room shows how I do not have the strength to tidy up. How willingly I am to let the mess accumulate over time. In other words, I have fallen back into my old routine. A routine where each day feels repetitive with nothing new and nothing to look forward too. I am not the same person I once was. The person I was before was happy, outgoing, and motivated to keep moving forward. Soon I realize, it is a signal of the bad habits arising. Because these habits have returned so has the start of isolating and overthinking. Each image is going to be printed onto Silk Crepe Georgette and Silk Habotai fabric. I am also going to incorporate some hand stitching with Gold Metallic thread. Each image is going to be approximately 8 x 10" or larger and hung off the wall by a metal rod.
Since I decided to continue to work with fabric, I experimented with two different types of photographic fabric. I had to figure out what settings or fabrics I should print on. In this test print I wanted to see how well the darker images would look like on thin fabric. I have noticed that it can be ink heavy because there is a small pool of a darker shade of black. Because both of my fabrics are thin and see-through, I wanted to put text onto handmade paper. Most of my images looked best with a dark background which gave me the idea of VanDyke. I learned that it was not worth the use of VanDyke and the handmade paper. Simply because the texture of the paper gets lost and for the darker images the words were not visible. In these few images I was experimenting on how I wanted to add my text. At first, I tried stitching my words onto the fabric. I noticed that the thicker fabric held the steadiness of the metallic thread. For the thinner fabric the thread was just too delicate to support the form of the thread it was taking. My next step was to envision how I want these images are executed. At first, I wanted to alter my images by cutting and stitching them onto the paper. Both images used Vandyke to show the text two different ways. On the image on the left, I thought of having part of my fabric off from my paper to show the delicacy of the material. On the image on the right, I cut with scissors and distressed the edges with a needle. I placed the image to where the words are legible. Although it creates an interesting dynamic between the image and the paper it still was not ideal.
I wanted to play more with light throughout my images. After photographing in the kitchen with only the refrigerator light I decided to use a spotlight with my other images. Within every photograph I took, it became timeless or still. I plan to incorporate more motion in my other photographs. Even though I like the stillness from the other images, my brain is not always still. The motion represents the anxiety and the overthinking that goes through my thoughts or brain. Session 3 These are my last photographs from my room sessions. Although I do like the warmth of the light, I plan to edit the white balance to match the tones from the other series. This is a small mockup on how I am planning on presenting my work. I will be having a metal rod that will be coming off from the wall. It will help the prints to have some movement as well as light shining through. I will have to bend the rod into the shape I am wanting to take form. Also, sanding it and painting it a gold metallic color. |
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